This has absolutely nothing to do with that controversial law. The pluralisation of the word stands testimony. The following is just to echo the woes of the enthusiast who yearns to get an article in his college magazine. He does realize that there are well over a three hundred and seventy seven articles under scrutiny and hardly ten make it all the way to the publishers’. So what does one have to write about that will effectively confirm his being one among the elite? For starters, never ask the editor or the editorial committee. For they would come up with their usual line “You can write about absolutely anything under the sun. But make it different and refreshing”. Fact is, most things under the sun are quite boring already and the remote expectation of something different yet refreshing under this sun would be a blue coloured watermelon.
If you were hanging onto the bandwagon that believes ignorance is bliss, you might go right ahead and write about something as mundane as your girlfriend’s pet walrus or the identical evil twin you wish you had. You skip watching a crucial show of Desperate Housewives, put in that hour’s thought, topped with continuous references to the thesaurus and bingo, you have crafted the most extraordinary article known to man. You are so completely satisfied with your accomplishment that you order in economic cheese bursts from Pizza Hut to celebrate the occasion and half way through your eighth slice, it hits you - Nothing about your article is good enough to make it all the way. Even those cool jokes you might have come up with about the uncanny resemblance between your girlfriend and her walrus would suddenly begin to appear stale.
The truth about a good article is a cult secret known to very few in this world. Some say it is humour, some say it is flowery language. The Johnny Bravos say it is better to write something boring and take the editor out for coffee instead. The glitch is, most editors are already male and I also clearly said we are not discussing Article 377 here. One who writes a good article takes something normal as a base and weaves something intriguing out of it. The topic is just a farce. Never think like a writer. Think like a reader and package in just enough so that they sit through your article and a smile plonks on their faces when they’re done. When you’ve begun to think like a reader, you’re already doing fine and dandy. There are only two ways to impress the editor - You either write something they love, or put a post-script mentioning the fact that you look extremely hot. So go get your paper and begin.
P.S: The irony in this whole plot is, I wrote this very article for my college magazine too. They didn't publish it. Honest.
